dear veronika, please think before you speak...

During our bathroom remodel, I was in charge of picking up the new toilet from Lowes.

We had already picked it out, so all I had to do was convince my mom to drive me out there, show someone what I wanted, pay, and then load it into her car.

Easy.

I walked into the store, cool, collected, and savvy.

Every few aisles, a friendly store clerk would politely ask if I was in need of assistance.

"Why, no thank you, I know exactly what I need!" 

I would reply with confidence.

Once I crossed the store and reached the plumbing section, I quickly realized I was in need of assistance as there was no way I could carry the box of disassembled toilet all the way to the register and out to the car.

No matter. From around the corner, another friendly clerk sprang out in front of me to ask if I needed help.

"Why, yes thank you. I'll be needing someone to load this into the car!"

Quick as a whip, we were at the register and ready to pay.

As I was swiping my credit card, the nice boy manning the register asked,

"Now, where are we putting this?"

Feeling very proud of myself at this point, I matter-of-factly replied,

"Oh! We're going to be putting this in the bathroom!"

Silence.

Wait...did I hear crickets?

Why is he looking at me like that?

Is he confused?

What did I say?

Doh.

"Ohhh...you mean which car are we putting this in?"

He nods. 

Then smirks.

"Right. Okay. It's the white Vibe parked out front. But, just for the record, we were thinking of putting this sucker in the living room. You know, make things easier...less distance to travel when we gotta go? Erhm, please just forget I said that, okay?!?"

Red as a beet and dragging my pride behind me, I darted out of the store without meeting the eyes of anyone in my path.

Savvy.

Real savvy.