Tuesday, October 19, 2010

the new birth of me...

I have something to share with you.
A little leap I've been trying to grow the balls to take in pursuit of a more fulfilling life and someday, career.
Something I have an huge interest in, and a desire to learn more and more about.
Having spent the past few months pouring over websites, gorging on book after book, and soaking in all the information I can, I have made a decision.

I am going to become, a Doula.

That may seem like small change, but to me, it's big massive bills.
I've spent the last eight years of my life at the same job. I never, ever would have thought that I would have the courage and ambition to anything other than what I have been for almost a decade! I just didn't. I love my job (and won't be leaving it any time soon...) and change and transitions, well, they make me nervous.

I just feel so, so driven to do this. 
For me. Just for me.

But, it's a big step.

When I was nearing the end of my high school years, the ever present question among the adults in my life was, "So, what college are you going to go to?"

After hearing that over and over and over again, I stubbornly made the decision to never further my education and prove to them all that I could have a great career and life without stepping foot onto a college campus.

Well, I proved them. My family bought a cafe and my sister and I ran it when we were 15 and 17 years old. We owned and worked that little shop for six solid years. And now, we sold it and are still working there, with a paycheck on Friday, and without the headache on Monday.

But now, with two nephews and a third un-gendered-as-of-yet on the way, birth, to me, is absolutely captivating. And I can't get enough of it! Seriously, mention meconium, mucous plugs, membranes, cervical positioning, posterior, anterior, placentas, or bowel stimulation...and I'm a happy, happy lady. Possibly a happy lady who will go on a crazy-girl tangent, but, nonetheless...

So, I herby announce, that I, Veronika, am furthering my education. Albeit, still without setting foot on a college campus, but, I'm doing it.

Someday, I'm going to wrap my arms around a laboring mama and whisper encouragement into her ear.

I'm going to watch a couple become parents for the first time.

I'm going to watch a big sister or big brother add a new little nugget of life to their world to terrorize and love endlessly.

And maybe there will be bloody shows and amniotic fluid splashed in my direction, but darn-it, there will be babies!

So, that's where I'm at. In the beginning stages of becoming a real life doula.
And I'm so, so pumped.

I hate to say it, but, you will probably hear even less of me in the next few months as all of my online and free time will be in study. And I know I've already been a shoddy blogger at best. But, can you imagine the stories I'll have once those swollen pregnant mammas start rolling (figuratively) in??

I can't wait, and I do hope you'll understand. I will still post here and there, but I might have to put this little blog here on the furthest back burner for awhile.

Love to you all.